This morning I discovered that I had started spotting. It's right on time, ten days past ovulation. I pretty much expected this cycle to be just like the others. I've been concentrating more on thinking about the laparoscopy, so now I can think about it more, knowing that it really will happen.

Yesterday I got a substitute scheduled for the day and a half I'll be gone from school. It's a mother of one of my students. Thankfully she doesn't know why I'll be gone. Right now only my principal/friend knows about the surgery. I'm not going to volunteer information about why I'll be gone, but if anyone asks, I'll just say it's outpatient surgery, a minor thing. We'll see who is nosey enough to ask. Probably my students will. Most adults have enough sense not to ask questions when information isn't volunteered.

I got information from the hospital yesterday about the laparoscopy. I'll probably have to come in two hours before the surgery is scheduled. That means I'll have to be there at 1:00 p.m. Since it will take my husband and me an hour to drive there, I'll have to leave home at 12:00 p.m or a little before then. That means I'll have to leave work at least thirty minutes before that, so I can bring my car home. I thought maybe my husband could pick my up at work, but then my car would be left there. Since I won't be up to driving afterwards, that idea wouldn't really work. Anyway, that leaves me with the plan of leaving school at 11:15 a.m., about a half-hour before lunch.

Here's another thing totally off the topic, but something that has been in my mind ever since it happened two weeks ago. I thought that I wouldn't be bothered by it, and I wouldn't even have to write it down. But it seems like the only way I can get it out of my mind is if I write it here. I feel really bad that it is bothering me. It shouldn't feel that way, and I don't want to feel that way, so I have no excuses.

This whole thing involves one little thing that seizure-girl innocently said. I wrote about seizure-girl once last August when she was all excited she was going to become an aunt. I was feeling sorry for her because I didn't know if she would be able to have kids with the seizures she was having.

Anyway, aparently the doctors told her she can have kids. I heard through my brother-in-law who is friends with her husband, that seizure girl and her husband were planning to start having kids when the husband finished college. The husband recently graduated and is now working as a permanent substitute for the rest of the school year.

Now that you know all the background, here's the story: After church a couple weeks ago I was standing near my pregnant sister-in-law and seizure girl. My sister-in-law asked seizure-girl if she had gotten results from all the testing that had been done to see why she was having seizures. I turned so I could listen because I was actually standing in a circle of people nearby. Seizure-girl said that the doctors had told her that she has a type of epilepsy. She said that they had kept her on the medication she was taking because it was for people with epilepsy. Then she said that she had to take lots of pills each day, and that included three pills of folic acid. I think my sister-in-law may have said, "Oh", but she didn't say much or ask any more. I was thinking, "Was that a hint that she and her huband are planning to get pregnant soon?" It had to be! How big of a hint can you give? Then I thought maybe it had something to do with the seizures. Then I figured it probably didn't. She figured that my sister-in-law would know what she's talking about since she is already pregnant and has worked as a medical assistant.

I was really annoyed at the whole thing. What a sneaky way of telling others that you are going to try for a baby. I feel guilty for feeling this way. But it sure does make me feel glad that three and a half years ago I didn't tell the world or hint that I was trying to have a baby. I don't think I would have enjoyed having to explain why nothing has happened these last three three and a half years.