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Adoption #3 Process
We will soon be starting our third domestic infant adoption!

_ ask for application
_ submit formal application
_ paperwork/self studies
_ medical exams
_ home visit
_ approval as a waiting family
_ design and submit profile
_ selection by agency for birthmother
_ placement of child
_ get Order Terminating Rights date
_ OTR hearing for birthparents
_ 21-day legal appeal period
_ sign petition for adoption
_ visits at 3 & 6 mo. after OTR
_ confirmation hearing

Blinkies








My Journey
Life With A Newborn and Birth Family Connections
Saturday, Nov. 01, 2008 @ 5:49 p.m.

I wasn't able to tell the whole story of how we brought home our new baby, so here is the rest. I don't have time for photos right now, but I'll add more later :).

We spent a couple hours at the hospital last Saturday, then went home for the night. It was kind of weird at the hospital since I didn't know anything about how the hospital works. They gave us a private room and carted the crib in there. Whenever I needed anything, I had to ask. No one told me. I felt stupid asking for diapers and formula, when they were under the crib all along. Did they just assume I would know what I was doing?

Our social worker stayed with us about half an hour and gave us more information about the birth mother. She left, and we stayed another couple hours. We could have stayed at the hospital overnight, but we were all tired, especially after the sleepless night on Friday. Sunday morning we all headed back to the hospital, and at about 1:30pm we arrived home with our new baby.

The last few nights have been interesting. I stay up late and my husband gets up early. I do all the feedings while we are both "sleeping" in bed.

Our case worker and the birthparent counselor both came to our home on Monday. Our case worker had been out-of-state visiting family over the weekend, so she had missed the whole thing! Also, our old case worker is currently in another country, on a mission trip, I think. Our case worker was sad that she wasn't able to contact her to tell her the news.

We had our first pediatrician visit on Tuesday. The nurse practitioner thought that baby C was sleeping too long. I think it's impossible to wake a sleeping baby, unless you undress them, so I was not going to do that. The next day baby C started sleeping for shorter spells, so that concern is no longer there.

We had a little issue with constipation last night and this morning, but now it appears that things have righted themselves. Things turned around inbetween my message with the pediatrician and their call back. The nurse told me it was probably a fluke. She gave me a remedy in case it happens again, so at least I am prepared.

We never expected to get another "good" baby, but this new little one is just another sweetheart. Formula, a cuddle, or a diaper change is all she needs to be happy. She really hates getting undressed, so I try to keep her unclothed for as short a time as possible. It makes calm diaper changes a challenge.

One thing about baby C that we really appreciate is that she is easy to feed. Our first daughter, M, was a messy eater and often would spit up. She always had a bib on, so I wouldn't have to keep changing her outfits. With the new baby I don't even use bibs because she rarely spits up, and then it's just a little while we are burping her. She's easy to burp too, which is wonderful!

Thursday our case worker called to schedule a visit to do court papers for our adoption. This adoption is a little different from our first because baby C was what's called a "direct placement". The baby was placed into our temporary custody by the birth mother. With our previous adoption, M was placed into the agency's custody and they placed her into our home. We were similar to foster parents, and had to abide by the same laws and get a foster license. With the direct placement we have this time, we don't need a foster license. It seems the only restriction we have is that we can't take baby C across state lines without permission from her birth mother. It's nice not to have to get background checks on everyone who babysits her.

I'll end with some information on baby C's birth mother. The birthparent counselor visited with her (I'll call her J) early in the week and she was able to see our profile for the first time. She thought we looked like a good family. J had decided that she wanted monthly updates from us sent to her home through the agency the first year. She is unsure if she wants to have a visit with us. My husband and I would really like to meet her. We did get pictures of J with baby C in the hospital from the birthparent counselor. J has a beautiful face and looks about 5 years younger than her age. She took good care of baby C in the hospital and you could tell in the photos that she really loves her baby.

I'll end here with something that to some might seem like a coincidence, but to us shows us that God planned this baby for us. Monday night I decided to look on MySpace to see if I could find J. I found her, and her page was public. I found some interesting things about her past relationships, as well as the names of the two children she is parenting and pictures of one of them. But it was when I looked at her friends that I was blown away.

When we left the hospital with baby C, the birthparent counselor told us the town where the birth mother lived. We thought it was interesting that our other daughter's birth mother had lived in that same town. Well, when I looked at J's MySpace friends, I was amazed to find that her second friend listed (out of only 19 friends) was my other daughter's (M's) birth aunt! Wow!!! My two kids have a birth mother and a birth aunt that somehow know each other! There were a couple other people that both have listed as their friends. I hope someday we will get to know J well enough that we can share the connection these two sisters through adoption have. If not, at least my two daughters will one day know that they came from the same place and that their birth families knew one another.

A couple of my friends thought this discovery proved that it was God's plan that my two girls be sisters. My mother-in-law on the other hand, was freaked out by the whole thing. Typical! My mother-in-law thinks it would be better if we didn't meet J. Thankfully she's not the one making the decision.

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then< >now

Recent Entries

Adoption Complete! Thinking About Another - Thursday, Nov. 05, 2009
6 Month Supervisory Visit Today - Wednesday, May. 27, 2009
New Information About Both Girls' Birth Families - Friday, May. 01, 2009
Visit with our Second Daughter's Birthmother - Thursday, Feb. 12, 2009
Things from the Birthmother, Preparing for the Meeting, and Cycle Returning to Normal - Sunday, Feb. 08, 2009


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